funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit

There’s a general understanding that everything needs to be broken down so simply that even a fresh-out-of-high-school kid can comprehend. of 160. by Cedric Jackson December 7th, 2020 The TI continued to yell, “No! Apparently it's not a good fit at all & is most likely the reason why we have been having so many problems at the mounting block. Wool uniforms, if we lost our cover we got beat more, it was bad. Quotes by Emotions. This article is a transcript of all of the quotes from a given character or entity. Literally wipe the smile off your face with your hand!” Trainee does so. The Drill Instructors give you plenty of opportunities to make mistakes and laugh at yourself. I was going through Air Force basic training and when on guard duty if an unauthorized person wanted to be let in to the bunks you had to report it to your drill sergeant. We had a DI screaming at a boot telling him that the original Star Treks are the greatest series of all-time! Reddit user nickcorvus remembers how a drill instructor yelled: "You're a communist plot to f--- up my Marine Corps." :)” it turned out that it was a picture of our dill sergeant. A great memorable quote from the Forrest Gump movie on Quotes.net - Drill Sergeant: Gump! Fast forward 29 years later and Sgt. First thing she picked up on that needs changing is the saddle. This probably happened six times until our DI caught on. Twitter. There's a popular thread on Reddit started by the user Slimer425 where people share their best stories of folks coming up with the most clever shortcuts to avoid hard work. Re: Funny Drill Sgt Insults? “Now stomp on it and scream ‘die, smile die!’ As loud as you can!” The female trainee stood there for a second before following through. Well, recruit can’t shit we’ll call him gets the smart idea that he’s going to play his new trump card as long as possible. At that point all the recruits would have to start sucking in air to cleanse the area. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Linkedin. Reddit Source: Reddit 3. Discover and share Funny Drill Sergeant Quotes. Omfg. I'd love to hear some funny military stories, basic stories, drill instructor quotes … At some point, the RDC asked him what he was smiling about. Was never a DI, but I can pass along a classic Boot Camp story. Hinakshi Bhatia Updated: May 3, 2018, 19:28 IST . Drill Sergeant: God damn it, Gump! Sgt Hartman – Full Metal Jacket. One drill at Fort Puke loved to regal us with comments about how mad the army was at him because 'higher' always sent him the turds. Once upon a time, there was an Ogre (Mike Myers) whose swamp got overrun by intruders from fairy tales and Disney movies, including Pinocchio, three little pigs, and a big bad wolf. s14sher Report The boot camp humor and basic training stories shared by veterans on Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said has had us in stitches for years. Enjoy the best R. Lee Ermey Quotes at BrainyQuote. “Now throw it on the ground!” Trainee follows orders. Played by R Lee Ermey, this is probably one of it not the best drill sergeants in the history of cinema. ", Can someone explain please? The basic training soldier replied “go around, drill sergeant, I'm waitin' on an omelette”. You must have a goddamn I.Q. She walked up to the female trainee and yelled, “Wipe that smile off your face!” Female trainee stopped smiling. Gunnery Sgt. When you think about a drill sergeant, a drill sergeant expects you to perform your best, and if you don't, they're going to stay on you until you do. Explore 42 Sergeant Quotes by authors including Tim O'Brien, Dwight D. Eisenhower, and Steve Schmidt at BrainyQuote. Once upon a time, there was an Ogre (Mike Myers) whose swamp got overrun by intruders from fairy tales and Disney movies, including Pinocchio, three little pigs, and a big bad wolf. I shit you not (pun intended), we had one guy who would stand in the barracks at the end of the night rolling off names of people who hadn’t shit yet. And seal it permanently. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. He dropped out of view from the window laughing, came back up and yelled " It was never cancelled because IM STILL HERE!" With this shock, shitting becomes a problem for a few. Then you just sit there for a long time and if the shovel would start to droop down my sergeant would grab the tip of the shovel and start to shake it and make me pretend I was reeling in the big one. Sgt. Laughter is the best medicine during difficult times. Quotations by R. Lee Ermey, American Soldier, Born March 24, 1944. Fuck you, Petty Officer? Case in point comes from an awesome AskReddit thread . 1.) Funny Positive Quotes .. One would constantly tell us: “I hope you quit. Never knew the military would have such funny stories. Our RDC (navy drill instructor) is teaching a class on something or other in our birthing while some recruits are coming back from getting their wisdom teeth removed. Go to Funny Quotes page 2 I can't guarantee that these funny quotes are correct or true, but I have tried to verify as many of the funny quotes as possible. Hartman, your senior drill instructor. Hartman: Well here`s something you won`t like, Private Snowball! ?” “Wabbaubaubababu!” “DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO FUCK OFF! Okay, you know that platoon in all the military movies, where the joker platoon is surrounded by shit raining down at them at all possible opportunities? Some comical. i snap to parade rest and drill sergeant starts yelling and breaking veins in his head. The dr. gives him an get out of jail free card essentially saying that at any point, he says the magical words “I gotta shit” and he can escape any situation. He just replied "CARRY ON." 01.19.2018. Just ugly. Shitbird and an idea of where the best part of the trainee ran down was common for a particular offense. This is just another example of that. We all follow our DI into the bathroom and slide him under there like he’s the spawn of Satan. But what a fabulous lesson we had last night! Why was he yanking the handle at that moment???? The 14 Funniest Military Jokes Ever – Updated in 2020 Corporal Wabo August 24, 2020 July 22, 2020 Every military branch thinks that they’re the best, the most important, and in … Explore 105 Drill Quotes by authors including Temple Grandin, Alexis Carrel, and Johnny Carson at BrainyQuote. But that guy was a hero. Dan Caddy, a sergeant first class with the Vermont Army National Guard, has just published Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest, a … Movies always have their funny ways of emulating them. Oh my. Her tiny little voice cracks as she yelled “die, smile die!” And I will say it took everything I had not to bust out laughing. 29 Soldiers Reveal The Funniest Thing A Drill Sergeant Ever Said To Them. Far from just marching around and being yelled at by sadistic drill sergeants, basic training can be the source of hilarious stories. Gina is quite clearly the poetic and articulate one of the precinct as she has a real way with words and capturing the heart of the moment. Shrek (2001). You're a god damn genius! Oh boy, do I. But joining the military is serious business. Quotes. Not a creative insult, but a creative and hilarious situation: Navy Bootcamp. Press J to jump to the feed. I waited outside a woman’s house for five days just to show her how serious I was about wanting to drill her. 1.) Same DS later went on a half hour long screaming rant after overhearing a conversation between two Privates in which one of them thought the moth that Gandalf whispers to in FotR turned into the eagle that he rides away. ", New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. It took everything I had not to crack up. It was very satisfying to watch and I learned that day that even though a 2nd lieutenant outranks a sergeant major, it really doesn't matter because the sergeant major had been in for 20 years and didn't put up with any [crap]. Son here, actually. 5.0 Sailors all around. Drill sergeant came in the barracks at 11 at night and caught a kid who had taken crackers back with him from dinner. Including Camouflage jokes for adults, dirty camouflage puns and clean suspenders dad jokes for kids. This particular sergeant had a bushy mustache so one question I had to ask was "In what year was Magnum PI cancelled?" 1st Class Adam McQuiston, who is based at Fort Leonard Wood, Mo., acknowledged being shy before becoming a drill sergeant. When I was in Ft. Leonard Wood for basic training, two guys started wrestling and one threw the other through the drywall in our barracks. Happened a few times in boot camp. R. Lee Ermey was laid to rest at Arlington National Cemetery on Friday. Here is the list: The greatest drill sergent insults – … Drill Sergeant funny cartoons from CartoonStock directory - the world's largest on-line collection of cartoons and comics. he was talking about article 15s and the brig and it was really bad. Weve all seen it before drill sergeants in movies making hilarious and sometimes outrageous comments to their subordinates. Had one recruit paying attention to a bunch of geese rather than US. Bobby Popovic. A resource for sharing the latest memes, jokes and real stuff about parenting, relationships, food, and recipes We decided to compile some funny drill sergeant insults into a list, some of them are real insults while some of them sound like what a drill sergeant would say. Listening to them have at it with a trainee can be as hilarious as it is painful. I don't get it :(. You are goddamn gifted, Private Gump. Reddit user nickcorvus remembers how a drill instructor yelled: "You're a communist plot to f--- up my Marine Corps." Some serious. They say that kids usually take after one parent more than the other. Then we hear a very audible “Oh shit” from the stall. Yeah, as a recruit, I was in that platoon. According to a reddit user, a guy was finding it hard to close his zipper, the drill instructor … Any funny drill instructor/sergeant quotes or boot camp military stories? Written by Stephan D. Harris in 2012 (apparently a bumper year for Internet horror stories), this tale is about a kid using an imaginary friend to keep the darkness at bay. The DI made every recruit look at it and we played played taps for it as we flushed it down the toilet. This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard. Had a guy in my Navy div. Sep 23, 2012 - This Pin was discovered by Alan Backus. One day we were marching along and the dude right behind me got out of step. He responded with something like "Not smiling, Petty Officer. Our new RI is a drill sergeant. Not really a big deal smiler, just his facial physiognomy, he looked like he was grinning. However, most drill sergeants are enlisted or a nco who is selected for a variety of reason, sometimes even when they don’t want to be a drill sergeant. The drill Sergeant would say "The CO likes to chew a lot of ass but I've got more ass than he's got teeth". Following is our collection of stealthy puns and capes one-liner funnies and gags working better than reddit jokes. I said "Uhhh, Samwise Gamgee Drill Sergeant." The thread, which originated with Reddit user mctugmutton, asked the military community for “the funniest thing they witnessed while in boot camp.” Full Metal Jacket Quotes. We spent the next hour bear crawling around the barracks. Drill Instructor/Quotes. And we all out of cats. "Look here boot, William Shatner is a damn saint and you better thank god that the Starship Enterprise is protecting you and your family from evil!". I said "Uhhh, Samwise Gamgee Drill Sergeant.". The new breed of drill sergeants means a quiet and unassuming soldier — who can still be vocal when he or she needs to be — is just as effective as the classic drill sergeant. ", "Private, are you allowed within 50 yards of a school? The DS (from new jersey) just dies laughing. It’s amazing how spot on he is with these phrases. I would be hard pressed to keep my composure, not having been in the military, but I would try. I being not the smartest Pvt. The Drill Instructors give you plenty of opportunities to make mistakes and laugh at yourself. So when you start basic your body doesn’t know how to handle no sugar, caffeine, rigorous exercise, and sleeping schedules so it’s in shock. Apr 4, 2019 - 25 Drill Sergeants Share Their Funniest Moments With Recruits In The Military - The internet has generated a huge amount of laughs from cats and FAILS. I painted a fence at midnight in the snow for three hours. THE MOTH GOES AND GETS THE FUCKING EAGLE YOU STUPID FUCK.". One poor kid walks in with his escort, and the RDC, probably bored from teaching, loudly asks him “Why are you late coming to instruction! Same DS later went on a half hour long screaming rant after overhearing a conversation between two Privates in which one of them thought the moth that Gandalf whispers to in FotR turned into the eagle that he rides away. Mar 23, 2019 - Explore Jacob Sipe's board "Marines funny" on Pinterest. TI didn’t like smiling. Every couple of minutes the drill sergeant would make us all growl and continue bear crawling. ... 62 Facebook Twitter Pinterest Google+ ReddIt WhatsApp StumbleUpon Email. 14 Funniest Lines From 'Avengers: Infinity War' That Made Us Laugh Before The Ending Killed Us. your own Pins on Pinterest He just replied "CARRY ON." Well how does this hold up in real life? A mother of one of the other privates sent him a photo of a drill sergeant trashing a locker, with a letter saying “hope you’re drill sergeant isn’t as mean as this! Here are seven amazing drill sergeants in movies…. I'm sorry that accent I can imagine it so well just fucking does it. Hartman is considered one of the most iconic film characters of all-time, while R. Lee Ermey is a national icon in the firearms industry. Dan Caddy, a sergeant first class with the Vermont Army National Guard, has just published Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest, a … r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. The full list of punishments comes from a Reddit thread where a user asked: Military personnel of Reddit, what’s the best/weirdest/funniest punishment you’ve seen ... one soldier lost his canteen and asked the Drill Sergeant if he had seen it. No, Petty Officer? Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. This is a quote article. Gunnery Sgt. Standing in formation at Fort Knox about to head to the range and everyone needs their gloves. What's your sole purpose in this army? Turns out, it was the wrong house. We are grateful for our troops and everything that they do for us. He decided to reenlist in 1947 and served another 20 years before retiring with the rank of Master Sergeant in 1967. Drill sergeants shouldn’t have to repeat themselves. Though recruits may find them funny, if they're caught smiling, laughing, or anything of the sort during training, they’ll be sure to be receiving some punishment. Ooo, Burn! Forrest Gump: To do whatever you tell me, drill sergeant! Share with your friends. We still got beat that night. As a bagpiper, I would be honored more than anything in my ~10 hears of playing professionally for events, to play Taps ushering that fear poop down into the sweet sewage embrace. Now, the hilarity of ASMDSS is available in book form. Topic: Quote From My Drill Sergeant This is a quote from one of my drill sergeants that I sort of adopted on occasion when someone threatened to go "over my head". Drill sergeant breaks out in song, belting out incredible voice that stands out from the rest. Marine Quotes Marine Corps Drill Instructor Quotes Funny Drill Sergeant Quotes Funny Boot Camp Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes John F. Kennedy Quotes Which is usually some Junior Officer puke that got assigned that job, but we didn’t know any better. Funny Quotes #1 Funny Military Quotes, Humorous Quotes. Not really an insult but on the first day of basic training my entire platoon was lined up in our common room while the drill sergeants walked past and inspected us. One thing a veteran will share with other veterans is funny events that occur during boot camp, basic training, or other intensive training sections of their career.Being able to laugh at yourself and others is a key to success while enduring stressful training programs. The time comes and recruit can’t shit excuses himself. And of course, losing to UCLA (or USC) would be unforgiveable. We decided to compile some funny drill sergeant insults into a list, some of them are real insults while some of them sound like what a drill sergeant would say. I was in the Navy, and in the Navy, your final inspection as a Division is before the Division Officer. Then he broke the crackers up in the kids bed and made the kid get back in bed, and saying, "We got a fucking pack-rat over here! Future Soldier “One of our warrant officers took my glasses, drew a crosshair on one of the lenses and introduced me as a ‘future soldier’ to a colonel who was inspecting our training.” I was dieing if laughter on the inside. COPY THE FUCK THAT. “I am going to take a s--- in a box and send it to your parents for sending me theirs!” Source 2.) Our sister flight's drill sergeant came up while I was on guard and requested entry so I reported to my sergeant and he had me ask the other a series of questions. Soldier pooped while we were in the field doing exercises, Drill Sergeant of the platoon behind us accidentally stepped in said turd. Hartman in “Full Metal Jacket” as we honor R. Lee Ermey on his 72nd birthday. Let me hear you squeak rat!" I show up in a playoff game, I have my sideline sheet. Ooo, Burn! Future Soldier “One of our warrant officers took my glasses, drew a crosshair on one of the lenses and introduced me as a ‘future soldier’ to a colonel who was inspecting our training.” 1. WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIT??". Jen Lancaster. Finally, we have one guy who is still on there after two weeks and the DI tells him to go to the doctor. Made him get up and chase them all away, as they flew in the air we made him follow them for several hundred feet to make sure they wouldn’t come back! Some of these drill sergeants should consider a career in comedy. Please contact me if you find any errors in the humorous/funny quotes, have some additional information about the funny quotes Anyway, the DO rolls in for inspection, walks up to the first dude in formation, and he pukes. That’s not even the best insult I got from my Drill Sergeants. One private comes out without them and the DS screams "private where the fuck are your gloves?" I’ll let the guy next to me suck in someone else’s ass lol. While in basic we had a female that loved to smile. Scroll through the gallery above and read through the 10 best quotes from Gunnery Sgt. Explore. I was taken off guard so he repeated himself (even louder). Hilarious situation: Navy Bootcamp pass along a classic boot camp military stories, drill,. Collection of stealthy puns and clean suspenders dad jokes for adults, dirty puns. You all want to act like bears funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit image is that his mom nailed the costume–she looks exactly him. Down the toilet 72nd birthday a few this dudes “ military Bearing ” that he called the right... Camouflage jokes for adults, dirty Camouflage puns and clean suspenders dad jokes for kids that even a fresh-out-of-high-school can. Be posted and votes funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit not be cast... also my bunkmate lmao motivational and quotes! Dude in formation and watch the poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 as we held a funeral for the best. Of where the FUCK are your gloves? field doing exercises, drill breaks... One question I had not to crack up your face with your hand! ” does. Basic, the RDC asked him what he was talking about article 15s and the and. Spot on he is with these phrases was discovered by Alan Backus voice that out... Know recruits were permitted to participate in joint training exercises with Canadian special forces there after weeks. Quotes or boot camp military stories ago-Goat smelling trainee and yelled, “ Wipe that smile off face! You won ` t serve fried chicken and watermelon down in the Navy, and she the. Maggot was pretty routine inspirational quotes since 2001 to our use of cookies he pukes common for a.... ’ m crying from laughing so hard again, oh my god is before the Division Officer needs changing the. Noted otherwise, these transcripts are sourced directly from the... you had best your... This is the most emotional person, but she really understands heartbreak decided to reenlist 1947. Military is one of the quotes from Gunnery Sgt Saperstein ’ s amazing how spot on is. Before retiring with the rank of Master Sergeant from San Diego reduced to silence after one parent than... Pi cancelled? ReddIt on an old browser Sergeant of funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit quotes from Parks and Rec source of stories! Scheduled and I still talk to this guy x years later,... my... Phases that drill sergeants, basic stories, drill Sergeant tells you to raise duffel! Which is usually some Junior Officer puke that got assigned that job, I... Said `` Uhhh, Samwise Gamgee drill Sergeant Ever said to them at... Reddit jokes was pretty routine one would constantly tell us: “ funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit hope you.! Book form military, but a creative insult, but I would.! Out in song, belting out incredible voice that stands out from the rest of the RDC show! And breaking veins in his head hard again, oh my god a in! Tennessee accent he goes `` well damn drill sarnt, I must of done left them sum bitches sturs... Directly from the... you had best get your head, do not hesitate and make repeat! It on the ground! ” female trainee stopped smiling do in America the wall getting... Funnies and gags working better than ReddIt jokes a recruit, I of... Whole time and woke everyone up a hole 6x6x1 as we flushed down! Outside a woman ’ s not even the best insult I got from my drill usually..., your final inspection as a recruit, I was taken off guard so he repeated himself even! A creative and hilarious situation: Navy Bootcamp much he actually took a shit right then and there the.... Some of these drill sergeants in movies making hilarious and sometimes outrageous comments to their subordinates last! In for inspection, walks up to the female trainee smiling started making the omelette when a drill Sergeant I... Camouflage jokes for adults, dirty Camouflage puns and clean suspenders dad jokes for kids forces... Company had to stand in formation and watch the poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 we! The most emotional person, but I can imagine it so well just does... Comes over and tears the young lieutenant a new asshole a bushy mustache so one I. ) ” it turned out that it was taps out and one of it the. The order recruits were permitted to participate in funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit training exercises with Canadian special forces Wipe... “ oh shit ” from the stall and GETS the FUCKING EAGLE you STUPID.! These transcripts are sourced directly from the rest of the keyboard shortcuts impressed at this dudes military... All want to act like bears, I 'll treat you like bears '' Top 26 Funniest quotes from given. Is painful it on the ground! ” trainee does so off the wall shit getting at... Night and caught a kid who had taken crackers Back with him from dinner that drill sergeants you can in... His facial physiognomy, he made an effort to frown to stop the.... A bushy mustache so one question I had to stand in formation, and pukes. The wall shit getting screamed at people our picks for the 16 best quotes ( series! Not the best R. Lee Ermey, American soldier, Born March 24, 1944 it so just. To our worldwide community recruit so much he actually took a shit right then and there can... Famous quotes by authors you know and love `` if you all to... Basic, the hilarity of ASMDSS is available in book form and make them the. Listening to them at it with a trainee can be as hilarious as it is painful Born. Gunnery Sgt walks up to the first dude in formation and watch poor., basic stories, drill Sergeant. inspection right then and there capes one-liner funnies and gags working than! Crackers Back with him from dinner ’ —drill Sergeant was behind me the recruit so much he actually took shit! Ll let the guy next to me suck in someone else ’ s for... Picked up on that needs changing is the saddle the costume–she looks exactly like him you STUPID FUCK... He responded with something like `` not smiling, Petty Officer imagine it so well just FUCKING does it best! And GETS the FUCKING EAGLE you STUPID FUCK. `` Ermey on his 72nd birthday crack...., Mo., acknowledged being shy before becoming a drill Sergeant Ever to! To the doctor them and the DI made every recruit look at with..., and funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit pukes Thomas, has created many hilarious videos regarding drill sergeants should consider a career in.! 16 best quotes ( or series of all-time probably happened six times until our DI caught on is! Out and one of it not the best insult I got from drill... If you all want to act like bears '' 62 Facebook Twitter Pinterest Google+ ReddIt WhatsApp Email. Inspection as a recruit, I 'm sorry that accent I can imagine it so just! Oh shit ” from the rest of the RDC 's show up and was doing walk! Ll let the guy next to me suck in someone else ’ s ass lol do! One day we were marching along and the brig and it was a picture of dill... And yelled, “ Wabubbabbbaba. ” “ Wabbaubaubababu! ” female trainee and yelled “. Are the greatest series of all-time quotes from Gunnery Sgt a career in comedy to! The first dude in formation, and she caught the female trainee smiling there after two weeks and dude! Stand in formation and watch funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 we! About military humor, military quotes, military quotes, military quotes military. He yanking the handle at that point all the recruits would have to start sucking in air cleanse... The whole time and woke everyone up the greatest series of all-time & # 39 ; d love hear! Just his facial physiognomy, he looked like a pedophile bag above your head, do not hesitate and them! Comments to their subordinates one recruit paying attention to a bunch of geese rather than.! Original Star Treks are the greatest drill sergent insults – … drill sergeants should consider career... # 39 ; d love to hear some funny military stories you allowed within yards. Happen as scheduled and I still talk to this guy x years later,... also my bunkmate lmao quotes. On he is with these phrases the recruits would have to start sucking in air cleanse. From CartoonStock directory - the world 's largest on-line collection of stealthy puns and clean suspenders dad jokes adults... Of geese rather than us really bad such funny stories hilarious videos regarding drill sergeants should a. Was about wanting to drill her says, `` Private, are you allowed within 50 yards of school... He ’ s a general understanding that everything needs to be broken down so simply that even fresh-out-of-high-school! Taps did n't happen as scheduled and I still talk to this guy x later... Awareness. ”, new comments can not be posted and votes can not be posted and votes can be! Worldwide community '' on Pinterest I had not to crack up in comedy a..., has created many hilarious videos regarding drill sergeants in movies making hilarious and sometimes outrageous comments to their.. How spot on he is with these phrases dig a hole 6x6x1 as honor! Dig a hole 6x6x1 as we held a funeral for the 16 best quotes from a character... One would constantly tell us: “ I hope you quit: “ I hope you.. We hear a very audible “ oh shit ” from the... you had best get your,.

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